Raf's leetle mooolteeeplyeee saaayyyt.

Back when I was younger I had my first taste of paradise. I went to this secluded island resort in Guimaras. There was a private beach in a tiny little cove and clear blue water as far as the eye can see... no one else was around except for the trade winds and a hammock under the trees. It was great... course it would've been better if my companion hadn't been my BROTHER... but anyway...

So on a clear blue sunny day... not a cloud in sight... we decided to take advantage of the fabulous coral reef off shore and go snorkeling. Now this is the first time in my life that I've done this... so my brother taught me how to use the snorkel and the mask. It was a quickie lesson so lets just say I didn't get it all right. So there I was paddling away in the middle of the ocean... staring at all the vibrant wildlife when suddenly my snorkel comes loose and the hose falls into the water. So there I was sucking fluid, thrashing about in 3 feet of water and trying to stand but I couldn't since the seafloor was covered in sharp and very painful looking corals. I was trying to signal to my brother that I was drowning and he finally saw that I was flailing about. So he stands up on a clear patch and shouts at me:

"STOP KICKING AROUND YOU'RE SCARING AWAY ALL THE FISH!"

THEN he swims away... cleary disgusted at my amateurish attempts of survival. Somehow I get the snorkel back up and made it to shore with about half a gallon of water in me but hey I'm still alive...

Oh yeah my brother is a certified genius. Graduated top of his batch in Yale. Graduated with honors in Law from Harvard. But for the life of me he can't see if his brother is drowning or not.

/applause